A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida …
A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband’s funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I’ve arrived
I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I’ve just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. sure is freaking hot down here!!!!
A busload of politicians
A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer’s barn.The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone.
The old farmer told him he had buried them.
The sheriff asked the old farmer, “Lordy, were they ALL dead?”
The old farmer said, “Well, some of them said they weren’t, but you know how them crooked politicians lie.”
Make me feel a woman again
A woman sat on a plane heading for New York, when the pilot annouces that because of difficulties with the plane’s engines, he must make an emergency landing. The woman, fearing that this may be the end of her life looks over to a man sitting next to her and rips her shirt and bra off, and throws herself on him. “Make me feel like a woman again!” she screamed. So the man rips his shirt off and hands it to her. “Here you go, you crazy bitch, iron this.”
Talk-show host can’t control his laughter
Movie Ranks
2006
- American Pie 5 : The Naked Mile - Rating 6/10
- Pirates of the Carribean : Dead Man’s Chest - Rating 8/10
- Lucky Number Slevin - Rating 8/10
- The Da Vinci Code - Rating 7/10
- The Fast and The Furious : Tokio Drift - Rating 6/10
- Underworld : Evolution - Rating 7/10
- The Prestige - Rating 9/10
- The Departed - Rating 9/10
2005
- Lord of War - Rating 9/10
- Sin City - Rating 9/10
- Danny the Dog - Rating 8/10
- Be Cool - Rating 7/10
- War of the Worlds - Rating 7/10
- Beauty Shop - Rating 6/10
- Memoirs of a Geisha - Rating 8/10
- Get Rich or Die Tryin’ - Rating 6/10
- The Wedding Date - Rating 7/10
- American Pie : Band Camp - Rating 7/10
- Star Wars : Episode III - Revenge of the Sith - Rating 9/10
2004
- Kill Bill Volume II - Rating 9/10
- Million Dolar Baby - Rating 9/10
- Alexander - Rating 7/10
- Taking lives - Rating 7/10
- Ocean’s Twelve - Rating 8/10
- Laws of Attraction - Rating 7/10
2003
- The Lord of the Rings : The Return of the King - Rating 10/10
- Kill Bill Volume I - Rating 9/10
- The Italian Job - Rating 8/10
- Underworld - Rating 8/10
- Out of Time - Rating 8/10
- Pirates of the Carribean : The Curse of the Black Pearl - Rating 9/10
- A Man Apart - Rating 6/10
- American Wedding - Rating 8/10
2002
- Catch me if you can - Rating 9/10
- Van Wilder - Rating 7/10
- The Lord of the Rings : The Two Towers - Rating 9/10
2001
- Ocean’s Eleven- Rating 9/10
- Super Troopers - Rating 8/10
- American Pie 2 - Rating 7/10
- The Lord of the Rings : The Fellowship of the Ring - Rating 9/10
2000
- Snatch - Rating 9/10
1999
- Fight Club - Rating 9/10
- Cruel Intentions - Rating 8/10
- The Matrix - Rating 10/10
- American Pie - Rating 8/10
- American Beauty - Rating 9/10
1997
- Seven Years in Tibet - Rating 9/10
1996
- Trainspotting - Rating 6/10
1995
- Se7en - Rating 9/10
- Braveheart - Rating 8/10
1994
- Pulp Fiction - Rating 9/10
<1990
- Alien - Rating 9/10
- The Godfather - Rating 10/10
Ranking info :
<7/10 - bad, only for fans of the genre
7/10 - decent
8/10 - a good way to spend your time
9/10 - great movie, must see
10/10 - movie that changed cinema
